Jedi 100 Acts of Kindness

June 7th

Week Twenty One Day Fourteen
Over the next 100 Days?
Random Acts of Kindness.

Today’s Act:
Make someone laugh
tell some jokes.

Sometimes life can be boring and dull
and the best random act of kindness
is to make someone smile.

So go ahead,
grab some jokes,
I promise you
telling them to people
will make it worth while!

6 7 2017 JP bottom pic

http://thoughtcatalog.com/melanie-berliet/2015/03/50-terrible-childrens-jokes-guaranteed-to-crack-you-up/

50 or so Jokes I got from the above link.  I just took out the advertisements and deleted a few that were either NOT child friendly and/or that just didn’t make sense.

 

1.Why did the superhero flush the toilet?
Because it was his doody.

2. How do you get a tissue to dance?
You put a little boogie into it.

3. What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!

4. If you’re American in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?
Euro-peein’

5. What do you call cheese that’s not yours?
Nach-o cheese.

6. What did the hat say to the scarf?
You hang around, and I’ll go ahead.

7. What time should you go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty.

8. What did one firefly say to the other?
You glow girl!

9. What did one ocean say to the other?
Nothing. It just waved.

10. Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad dressing.

11. What do you call a blind dinosaur?
A do-you-think-he-saw-us.

12. What do you call two guys hanging on a window?
Kurt and Rod.

14. How do you catch a whole school of fish?
With bookworms.

15. How do you find Will Smith when he’s lost in the snow?
You just look for fresh prints.

16. Why did the mushroom like to party so much?
Because he was a fun-guy.

17. Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?
Lack of concentration.

18. What did one tonsil say to the other?
Better get dressed. The doc’s taking us out tonight!

20. Knock, Knock.
Who’s there
Stopwatch!
Stopwatch who?
Stopwatch you’re doing and open this door!

21. What do you call a guy lying on your doorstep?
Matt.

22. What do snakes take for their allergies?
Anti-hissssss-tamines.

24. What do snowmen call their fancy annual dance?
The Snowball.

25. Why is it so windy inside a sports arena?
All those fans.

27. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Cause he was feeling crummy.

28. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Who
Who who?
Hold on. Is there an owl in here?

29. How do you keep a bull from charging?
Take away its credit card.

30. Why should you never trust a pig with a secret?
‘Cause it’s bound to squeal.

32. What did the fireman name his twin sons?
José (Hose A) and Hose-B.

33. What do cows read?
Cattle-logs.

34. What does a spider’s bride wear?
A webbing dress.

36. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Cash.
Cash who? (cashew)
Thanks, but I’d rather have some peanuts.

37. Where do young cows eat lunch?
In the calf-ateria.

38. What did the policeman say to his tummy?
Freeze. You’re under a vest.

40. What do you call a rich elf?
Welfy.

41. What do birds give out on Halloween?
Tweets.

42. What do you call a smart group of trees?
A brainforest.

43. Knock, Knock.
Who’s there?
Yacht.
Yacht who?
Yacht a know me by now!

44. What did one horse say to the other at the dance?
You mustang-o with me.

45. What’s the definition of a good farmer?
A man outstanding in his field.

46. What washes up on tiny beaches?
Microwaves.

47. What do you call it when a dinosaur crashes his car?
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.

48. How do mountains stay warm in winter?
Snowcaps.

49. What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.

50. A sandwich walks into a bar.
Barman says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food in here.”

 

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